WARNING: You are about to see some very scary selfies in this post. Feel free to look away now, or don’t, but you have been warned.
Last Sunday morning, I woke up looking like this:
I could barely open my eyes enough to take that selfie if that tells you anything.
I woke up to my alarm going off at 10 am (yes, I have to set an alarm on the weekends, or else I will just sleep the day away), and was feeling a little groggy (I may have been slightly over-served at the beer truck the night before). My eyes felt very heavy and my first thought was, did I drunkenly not take off my eye make-up or take out my contacts last night? I could have sworn that I did…. After a few lazy minutes playing with Louie I still can’t really open my eyes all the way, so I head into the bathroom to see what the deal is. Well, turns out I did remove my eye makeup and take out my contacts and for some reason my eyes are practically swollen shut and red. Awesome, I guess I won’t be making it to my Barre3 class at 11 am as planned. Oh, and I have a tennis match this afternoon, how is that going to work if I can’t see…
I start screaming to Brian from the bathroom to come look at my eyes and I can tell from my half-vision that he is pretty disgusted by what he sees. What the F happened to me last night?! I wash my face and hope that will help the eyes, but nope, still half swollen shut and RED. I start sending selfies to my mom and call her in panic mode. I must have had a reaction to some expired makeup she says. ‘Put ice on your eyes to help with the swelling, then rub some hydrocortisone cream onto the red parts – don’t get it in your eye – and throw on big sunglasses if you have to leave the house.’ Dr. Mom saves the day!
I spent the next hour lying on the couch icing my eyes listening to Southern Charm (love that show!) on TV in the background. I think Brian felt bad for me, so he brought me breakfast and iced coffee while I lay there looking pretty pitiful. After a while, things were getting a little better and I could almost open my eyes all the way, but they were still very irritated and puffy. I eventually pulled myself together enough to leave for my tennis match around noon, and threw on the largest and darkest sunglasses I could find.
Somehow I made it through 3 sets of tennis (for the win!) and hosted my family for dinner on Sunday night. I haven’t been wearing any eye makeup to let this thing heal completely, and feel completely naked without it, although it does save me an extra few minutes in the morning!
The moral of the story: don’t buy the cheap makeup that’s on clearance at Target – there is a reason it’s on clearance – and wash makeup brushes regularly. You’re welcome for sharing this insight (and my scary selfies) – I would NEVER wish this situation on my worst frenemy. Have you ever seen an expiration date on make-up? Nope, because the FDA doesn’t require it, so how are we supposed to know when to throw out our beauty products?! Here are some tips that I will be following religiously (after I throw out all my current products) on when and how to wash makeup brushes and when to replace your makeup. If you’ve been using the same mascara for a year, it’s time to let it go as they say in Frozen.